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Mrs. Kopp's comments will be in PURPLE! 4/2/09 Final Essay.

Thesis - The Padaung Tribe of Burma has many different views of beauty, including ear piercing and their main custom of brass coil neck rings.

I. Ear piercing A. custom for all girls to pierce their ears B. it is supposed to make them beautiful C. jewelry comes from the mountains D. ceremonies for the occasion are going away

II. Reason why they are put on A. considered rings on their neck beauty B. was said that it was protected from tiger attacks, and one myth was told that a beautiful dragon wore them C. ancient tradition D. the longest neck is considered the most beautiful

III. How they put them on and age when put on A. start at 5-6 years old (girls) B. wear throughout their entire life, adding on one ring every two years C. doesn't really make the neck longer, pushes the shoulders down and the neck up

IIII. Consequences A. if you take it off you will die B. the neck muscles are not used because the brass rings support their neck and they will suffocate if they take them off. their head will go down and clog up their throat.

IV. Conclusion A. their beauty is seen differently than ours B. they have very different traditions C. different cultures have different beauty This outline looks great!

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Beauty is seen differently through the eyes of other cultures. Some acquire "odd" traditions, or customs with beliefs. Others find it as having a certain brand of clothes, having a special hair style, wearing some kind of jewelery, and more. But, the Padaung Tribe of Burma is the complete opposite of this. They find beauty in another way - not involving makeup, clothing, hair, or skinniness. The Padaung Tribe of Burma has many different views of beauty, including ear piercing and their main custom of brass coil neck rings. Excellent intro paragraph!

When girls reach a certain age in life, it is a custom for them to get their ears pierced. There is a small ceremony or a party held for this occasion and it is an important time in a girls life. On the day of the ear piercing, the girl will wear a court dress. The purpose of this is to make the girls look more beautiful (Noi 57). Also, most of the jewelry is made of silver and jewels, which are found in the nearby mountains(Fetzer 945). Jewelry worn by women is normally silver, or gold ornaments set with jewels. This ear piercing custom is still going on today in Burma, but parties and ceremonies for the occasion are going away because the cost to make a feast is expensive. An idea much more popular in Burma than this is the use of brass neck rings (Noi 57).

The Padaung Tribe of Burma has various reasons as to why the women put brass coils on their neck. First, they plainly think it is beautiful. The longer a neck is, the more beautiful it is seen to be, from the tribes point of view. Like most tribes, they believe in myths or stories told to keep a tradition alive. One myth was said that the coils protect villagers from tiger attacks if worn. Thus, by women wearings these coils it should keep them safe. Very interesting information! Another was told that a gorgeous dragon wore coils and was a hero, basically. This shows that if a good-looking dragon wore coils and was very helpful, the tribe should too, since it was a story passed on. Of course, those two are only legends, and the second one is very fictional. Lastly, many tribes, families, or groups of people have traditions. This one is ancient, as has been passed down generation to generation. If this is something about beauty and it's an ancient tradition it is going to be used and past on for a long time (Gray). This paper is very well written! The brass coils begin to be put on girls at age six. This is so they can produce an appearance of a longer neck in their lifetime. The rings never get taken off and are worn throughout the girls lifetime. Every two years a ring will be added which never stops (Flickr). Though the neck appears to be longer it is really a mirage. The shoulders are pushed down while the chest is pushed up to make the neck look longer. You can tell how the neck looks normal on a small child compared to an adult: (Fetzer) punctuation goes after the citation because it is part of the sentence. The child's rings look like a huge necklace with a normal size neck, while the mothers neck looks much longer than a usual size neck. In this picture, the girl looks older than the child above. But, her neck still looks the same. Though more rings get added throughout a woman's lifetime, they start out with shorter looking necks. The elderly above has an extremely long neck appearance and more rings since they got added throughout her whole life. Interesting! What if the women don't want the neck rings? Unlike beauty for American's, we do not really have any consequences. Sadly, for this tribe their consequence is horrible; death. It is not that the women are put to death, it really is health issues. Wearing these brass coils is not like wearing a necklace, people can take it off whenever they want and do not have to wear it for life. But, the brass coils reduce the neck muscles.The muscles are not used because the brass rings support their neck and they will suffocate if they take them off. Then, their head will go down and clog up their throat This is more of a harsh kind of beauty, one that we as American's do not get as often. American's do not live with something "beautiful" their whole lives, they can decide if they want to or not, depending on their customs. Great comparison to our own culture. With the Padaung Tribe the women have to live with this "beauty" and have no choice whether or not they want to live without the brass coils or not. Men will not accept women with no brass coils and since the majority of women want to have kids and have a husband they all put the coils on; and will not take them off since death is the answer. (Nilloc) wow

In conclusion, The Padaung Tribe of Burma sees beauty in another way than us Americans. Beauty is different for everyone as a matter of fact. Americans cannot just classify something and call that "beautiful" because it can be something different in someone elses eyes. For others and not just yourself, beauty can be seen in all different shapes and sizes. With this tribe's brass coils, it can be like clothing to us. Avoid saying us and you in professional writing They classify the brass coils as something gorgeous for women that is needed in life. We too classify other things beautiful just like the Padaung Tribe. Thus, though their beauty is something that's "strange" to us it is beauty to them. People cannot change beauty because not one thing is truly beautiful, anything and anyone can be if you just look at it a certain way... to some beauty is not skin deep. EXCELLENT STATEMENT All together, The Padaung Tribe of Burma has beauty in another kind of way than us, but they still know what beauty is. The brass coils may go away tomorrow, or stay for a lifetime; either way, it's their belief of what true beauty is. This paper is well researched, interesting, and well written - I"m very proud of you guys! []

 This works cited should be in ABC order.

Works Cited __"Padaung Tribe long neck." Flickr. 18 Mar. 2009. <[]>.

Gray, Denis D. "Padaung 'giraffe women' ." Seattle Pi. 9 Apr. 1998. 17 Mar. 2009. <[]>.

"Student Research Center- powered by EBSCOHost: Human Zoo." Student Research Center. 18 Mar. 2009. <[]>.

Fetzer,__ Junior Worldmark Encyclopedia of World Cultures__. vol. 6. Detriot London: U*X*L Co., 1999.

____. 20 Mar 2009 [].__

"Kayan (Burma)." Wkipedia__. 18 March 2009. Wkipedia. 20 Mar 2009 [|http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kayan_(Myanmar)]__

Noi, Goh Sui. __Cultures of the World- Burma__. Singapore: Marshal Cavendish Corp., 1992.

Rubrics for your Research Paper

- The research paper must contain a thesis statement that is discussed and proven in the paper. Stick to your topic. 50 pts +50 -Paper discuss beauty in the culture you were assigned and also reflects on how that beauty is maintained. 30pts +30 -Each group must complete an outline BEFORE they start writing their paper and submit it with the final paper. 20 pts +20 - Parenthetical citations (in MLA format) must be used correctly throughout paper. 25 pts +24 - A works cited page must be included at the end of your paper. 20 pts +15 -Researched information must be paraphrased correctly or in quotes. 25 pts +25 --Each group has used at LEAST two book sources, one internet source, and one database source. 15 pts +15 - Paper includes photos and video that enhance writing. 40pts +40 -Paper contains correct spelling, transitions, complex sentence structures, and good vocabulary. 20 pts +20 -Photos and video are placed in appropriate places in the paper. 15pts +15

Total Points: 254 /260 = 98 A+ Excellent!

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